Are you allowed to have quarter-life crises when you’re 30? What do we call it then? I’m really starting to get tired of these things. I’m getting old and I really just want to not give a fudge and just do what I want to do. That sounds nice right? Even as I’m typing this now, I’m like wait, maybe I shouldn’t have used the f-word (I edited it to fudge). But why do I even care? This is my space and this my time to let it all out.
I think the reason art, whether it be visual or motion picture, music or whatever, makes sense to me is because as you get older you start to feel like you need to be the best version of yourself. The most composed and balanced version of yourself. But the last few weeks I feel like I’m completely become unhinged and really, not for any single reason. It’s just a lot of little reasons. I’m constantly battling with myself in my head. And listening to the right song or watching the right movie is the only thing that makes me feel at ease or allows me to make sense of what’s going on in my head and heart.
This year, I’ll let myself do what I want.
This year, I’ll enjoy the small moments and seek to make extraordinary new ones.
This year, I’ll make more art that speaks true to my soul.
This year, I’ll make more products that connect people to my designs.
This year, I’ll visit more and love more.
There are a number of things I’ve been trying to work on in the last month or so. I’ve been so quiet on here and even on social media.. but I had to take ten minutes right now (like literally decided two minutes ago) to just get out what’s on my mind. These are the things I’ve been thinking about non-stop, which will hopefully get me moving forward in all kinds of good ways before the holidays creep up on me.
- how to self regenerate and eventually become so good, it will only take an hour or two to feel balanced
- how to apply things I learn in one workplace and apply them to the other areas of my life, like my art and my physical health
- how to stop complaining/lamenting/resigning and just work on proactive solutions
- how to stay connected and discern which connections are worth investing energy in
- how to take risks and stop caring what everyone else thinks
Wish me luck! I gotta go get ready for work now…
I can’t help it. Winter makes me want to hide in a baggy long sweater! My obsessions turn towards tried and true accessories – beanies, fingerless gloves, booties. I love breaking all of these out of my drawers and super thankful that they’re still in style. What’s your favorite cold weather accessory?
The longer I look at these quilts by Ria Leigh, the more I fall in love with them. Her textile designs are everything I’m loving right now, with a nod to synthetic retro color palettes and a reverence for the tradition of geometric quilt pattern. I don’t think I can put it any more succinctly than she does on her own site:
Her work is situated within a matrilineal succession of makers and is influenced by her research on ancient cultural iconography, esoteric symbolism, pioneer practicality & Bauhaus ideology.
With work this bold and a statement so eloquently drafted, I can only presume that she’s been working on this for a lot longer than the ease of her patterns may suggest.
Reality TV isn’t something I tend to share on this blog, but I had to make an exception for The Bachelor. YES I SAID THE BACHELOR. I hated admitting that I watched every episode this season until all of the internets agreed that this may have been the best, or rather most entertaining, season the show has ever seen. I’ve never in my life watched an entire season of The Bachelor or The Bachelorette until now. And why the hell did I? Well, many things. First and foremost, Monday night TV just seemed so bleak. Besides HIMYM, which I watch online anyways, there was nothing engaging me to look past my laptop. So my boyfriend and I casually put on The Bachelor as mildly amusing background fodder. Little did we know, we would actually start watching it. Like, really watching it. Well maybe more me watching it and making him look up at the really intense parts.
What’s super ironic about the fandom generated around this season is that, like me, a lot of the viewers loved this season because they generally despise the conceit of the show in the first place. A reality show competition involving a group of women fawning over a singular suitor? That sounds like the lamest and saddest thing ever. Yet so many of us threw the towel in and indulged this season. Why? Well, darling, let me count for you the ways.
It’s been a while since I’ve written something real in here. Don’t get me wrong, all my posts are completely genuine and from the heart; I love being able to share the things that leave me in awe. But I guess I’m just afraid that I’ve trapped myself in a corner, hiding behind all these pretty pictures and styled outfits, convincing myself that this was always my original intent. But it’s not, really. It’s so easy to forget what it is you’re working towards when you’re surrounded by all these lovely distracting things, even more so for someone as visual as myself. I do love food, I do love fashion, I do love Atlanta, I do love a lot of things. The thing I’ve forgotten is that this blog was not just about loving and sharing these beautiful little things.. it’s also about the big picture too. You know, the picture of my life. I’m still sketching it all out and it’ll always be a work in progress.
As I get closer to the first anniversary of Tide & Bloom (!!!), I’d like to tweak and re-state my intention for this space. It may take some rambling posts about patience, creativity, and the like (you know the deal), but I believe that reflection is in order. It may take me a while to figure out the next step, so my posts may become irregular or sparse in the coming weeks. But it will all be for the purpose of my sanity, for re-calibrating the balance in my life.
If you’re a regular reader, I thank you for bearing with me through my first year. I’ve learned so many things about myself and had the chance to connect with a lot of amazing and inspiring people. I intend to continue sharing the beautiful discoveries in my journey and I hope you’ll stay along for the ride!
Of everything I’ve received this year, one of the best gifts has been one I gave to myself – this blog. It’s been a place for me to share, vent, contemplate, and rejoice.
I’ve had the wonderful and priceless pleasure of meeting some amazingly inspiring people and I’m so looking forward to continuing all of it in 2014. I am so grateful for anyone and everyone who’s given me a chance, taken note of my presence, or supported me in my meandering endeavors. I wish you all good tidings and hope that this season fills your heart with warmth and joy.